Imagine you’ve had a friendly relationship with your next door neighbor for generations — almost as long as you’ve lived there. They are the best neighbors you could ask for! You visit each other often to share backyard harvests and lend a hand on improvement projects. They kindly overlook your rowdy parties. Your sons have even gone to war together. You have had each other’s backs for as long as anyone can remember.
Imagine you have now remarried your abusive ex, against all good judgment, and he intends to take over your neighbor’s plot for no reason other than he wants it. Not to mention, they have some nice-looking trees that he could chop down for a new patio! And because the neighbor has a reputation for being kind, he assumed they would simply hand it over. When they say no, as any reasonable homeowner would, your ex becomes aggressive and threatening. Now deeply offended, your neighbors put their elbows up to defend their property. Nearly all the other families take your neighbor’s side against this illegal bullying — leaving you isolated and vulnerable. His only remaining friends are a few gang leaders he admires and doesn’t realize are playing him.
Imagine belligerently alienating your best and most important neighbor, the one you relied on to get through difficult times and keep the neighborhood safe. Imagine driving away all your longtime friends and allies, and aligning with thugs. And thinking this all, somehow, will generate more respect rather than less.
Imagine.